#34 The Most wonderful Time of the Year

Hello wonderful people, how are we?

I have a confession to make… prior to sitting down to write this week’s newsletter, I strongly debated lying to you.

However, I’m one of the World’s worst liars… I can just about people please, which occasionally involves being slightly economical with the truth in order to make people ‘like me’… but proper lying? - it makes me feel sick to the pit of my stomach.

Whilst I guess it means you can trust me, it also means I speak the truth (or don’t speak at all). In this instance, it means confessing that this week has been a case of ‘same old’ - a bit of a trudge-filled, miserable one.

It’s so hard to keep showing up openly when you feel rubbish. Aside from lacking the motivation to sit down and write stuff on here or talk in general (I’ve been known to walk a different route somewhere to avoid interacting with people during particularly difficult times), it feels really uncomfortable to be continuously moaning to you, I want to be spreading joy and positivity not wallowing in self-pity. Nevertheless, I can’t flick a magic switch and trying to fight the feelings isn’t going to help, so for now, it’s a case of ‘this is me’ and I’ll do my best to feel brighter next week… or the one after that!

The most wonderful time of the year

Amidst the misery, there have been some little lovely moments:

Firstly, can we all agree that this really is the most fabulous time of year… yes summer is ‘holiday season’, dining al fresco becomes a possibility, we are blessed with absurdly light evenings, ice cream becomes one of our 5-a-day, and paddling in the sea or maybe a puddle if that’s all you’ve got is a necessity, but IMO, Spring trumps all of that - there’s all that promise and new life, everything becomes so vivid with colour, the birds serenade us daily and everywhere smells FRESH. In truth, my mood has been so grey at times during this week that I have struggled hugely to acknowledge quite how fabulous my surroundings are… however, my early morning wander with Olive has been the epitome of mindfulness - just me and nature, no cars, no humans - meanwhile as I sit writing this, I can hear a Robin singing from the top of its voice, I also have started hearing the dulcet tones of lawn mowers firing up around my close, I have been MARVELLING at the pretty purple and pink flowers (Google informs me these are more specifically called Grape Hyacinth and apple blossom respectively) in peoples gardens and the tulips and camellia… the psychological comfort may be short lived but it’s there and I’m incredibly grateful for it.

I also love this time of year because I love all the fruit and veg that starts to come into season, from cauliflower, wild garlic and spring greens to rhubarb, beetroot, mint, and asparagus - it literally makes me excited, gawd I live a wild life! I also love the recipes that become seasonal… it just feels like your possibilities become endless in and around the kitchen and I’m totally here for it!

One of my absolute favourite Spring/Easter recipes is, of course, hot cross buns, now I know I’ve left it late and you’d have thought my love for them would have urged me to act sooner, but as I mentioned last week, I lost track of time OK? And honestly they tasted SO good this week that I’m of the mind that my abstinence up until now paid dividends in terms of increasing the satisfaction. More Hot X bun chat in a bit.

What else have I got to report?

• Cookies… I have unearthed some chocolate chip cookie findings that, despite needing a bit more refinement, I’m SO excited to share with you in the forthcoming weeks.

• I threw together a very spontaneous but pretty fabulous roasted tomato and ricotta pasta dish this week. Unfortunately, I was rather negligent in terms of noting down what I did but fear not, I will go in again and this time concentrate better so that I can share it with you.

• Olive was spayed this week, so she’s been receiving all the TLC whilst feeling a little sorry for herself! She’s currently sporting a comical inflatable neck collar and a onesie to stop her licking her wound neither of which she’s LOVING… the countdown to being healed and back fighting fit is well and truly ON!

• SOME REAL PEARLS OF WISDOM… I’m adding this last minute, I just heard it and feel compelled to include it. I’ve just listened to an interview with Gyles Brandreth, and he revealed the 7 secrets to happiness that he discovered during a particularly challenging time in his life. I frantically scribbled them down as follows:

  1. CULTIVATE A PASSION: find something that you enjoy doing, something that will sustain you, distract you, and delight you, when all else fails.

  2. BE A LEAF ON A TREE: To thrive, you have to be both an individual — with a sense that you are unique and that you matter — and at the same time you need to be connected to a bigger organism. BE YOU, entirely unique and fabulous, and share your individuality with others - be socially involved.

  3. BREAK THE MIRROR - stop looking at yourself. Stop thinking about yourself — have done with narcissism and self-regard — avoid introspection.

  4. DON’T RESIST CHANGE - Change is important. People who are fearful of change are rarely happy. We don’t mean massive change, necessarily, but enough change to keep your life stimulated. 

  5. AUDIT YOUR HAPPINESS - How much of each day are you spending doing something that doesn’t make you happy and how many things make you sad or angry? If more than half of what you’re doing makes you unhappy, then change it. 

  6. LIVE IN THE MOMENT - Stop thinking about what’s coming next, stop checking the mobile, or predicting the likelihood of the next eventuality occurring. Be present, seize the day and relish what is happening now.

  7. BE HAPPY - And, finally, if you want to be happy . . .  Be Happy. Act it, play the part, put on a happy face.  Start thinking differently. As the Dalai lama said - ‘Choose to be optimistic, it feels better.’

  Having listened to these 7 seemingly simple enough ‘rules’, I felt a glimmer of optimism. Nothing is that new or revolutionary in this list, but it’s all VERY true. Now, I’m not saying this is going to work for us all immediately… but I’m going to do my absolute best to implement a few of these secrets into my daily routine going forward!

I’m frantically trying to think of other events from this week, but the days seem to have evaporated with little else to report… incredibly dull I’m afraid! I suppose it’s a about time we got into the hot cross bun chat though so here goes…

Zest n’ Chai spice HOT X Bunz

From a recipe perspective, this week has been all about hot cross buns. Developing some recipes makes my head ache SO much - as a rule, I find the simpler the recipe, the harder it is to nail (chocolate cake/chocolate chip cookie/shortbread… and more, I’m looking at YOU!), others are a joy to behold and just come to me, quite literally on a plate, and this was one of them.

I first made hot cross buns on Bake Off - back then I was a real fledgling baker and recipe development was anything but plain sailing. Admittedly the time constraints imposed during the competition didn't make things easier, but I distinctly recall struggling SO much in the week leading up to making my zest and spice HXB’s in the tent. First off my dough was dry (like ARID) and heavy - kill the ducks heavy - on the next attempt, it was gummy and raw, meanwhile, my ratio of fruit to dough was wildly off on more than one occasion and choosing which dried fruit to incorporate presented another conundrum, finally, nailing flavour - specifically the level of spice and zest, took so much tweaking that by the end of the week, I was completely desensitised to what tasted good, bad, or indifferent - I also think hot cross bun aroma was seeping out of my pores - catchy! Anyway, the blood, sweat and tears were worth it because the judges thought they were a bit of alright and, much to my utter shock, I somehow managed to blunder through another week - on that note, I should probably fill you in on more about my baking journey and the whole Bake off experience at some point shouldn’t I? For now, I’ll leave you in suspense, but at some point, I’ll give you a bit more of the back story - makes me sound like I’m in a rock band!
[quick side note, the recipe for my Bake off HXB’s is here by the way, they were v.good and defo worth a try… BUT… I think the ones below are better so try them too]

Anyway, back to this recipe, I really really really like this one… it is a little faffy in parts and requires a tiny bit of pre-planning but I swear you will be rewarded! The recipe was based on the one from Bake Off but tweaked to include a chai tea and spice infusion which contributes a wonderful amount of flavour, I add a little dried spice too just to make sure that spice SINGS, I also suggest using a preferment below because this really amps up the flavour of the dough, it also makes the dough easier to handle. I included cranberries in my dough on Bake off but opt just for my favourite of the dried grape fam, sultanas, here, there’s zest and mixed peel for that citrus kick and proportionally a touch more butter as well as a small proportion of plain flour for a tender, plusher dough! These guys are baked in a tin for that fabulous pull apart tear - arguably the best bit - and brushed with a spice sugar syrup that I could possibly drink it’s that yum!

The best part about making these buns, aside from the eating? They bought me SO much joy, it was kinda transient because when the world feels grey, happiness doesn’t always stick around for long, but it’s small wins eh? If you attempt these, I really hope you too can experience that same level of satisfaction!

Recipe
Serves: 12

Ingredients

Chai tea infusion

1 x Chai teabag
7 Cardamom pods
5 cloves
1 x star anise
1 x cinnamon stick
1 x Nutmeg
230ml Water

Preferment

115g strong white flour
75g Whole milk
¼ tsp (levelled) Instant yeast mine weighed around 1.3g (don’t sweat the weight of it too much)
5g Soft light brown sugar

Main Dough

235g Strong White flour
100g Plain flour
Preferment from above
55g Light brown sugar
9g fast-action dried yeast
1 tsp Ground mixed spice
1 tsp Ground cinnamon
8 g Sea salt
1 x orange zest
1 x lemon zest
150ml Chai tea spice infusion (see above)
1 large egg [57g]
60g softened butter
135g Sultanas
50g Candied peel

Paste – for the cross
50g Plain flour
5g Caster sugar
40-45g Water

Glaze

~ 35ml of the Remaining Spice water
One chai tea bag steeped for around 30 minutes in 150ml boiling water.
75g Soft light brown sugar

Method

First prepare the preferment. Measure the flour, sugar, yeast, and milk into a bowl, mix just to form a cohesive stiff dough. Cover and leave to proof for around 12 hours – I leave it overnight – or until risen and a little puffy.

Next prepare the chai tea infusion, combine all the ingredients in saucepan, place over a medium heat, bring to the boil before removing from the heat and immediately covering the pan with clingfilm before leaving to cool and infuse for a minimum of 1 hour – overnight preferable.

To prepare the main dough, first pour boiling water over the sultanas and leave to soak for a minimum of 10 minutes. Once soaked, drain thoroughly and pat dry – reweighed weight should be 160g ish.

Next, strain the spices out of the chai tea infusion, measure out just 150ml of the liquid and reserve the rest for the spice water. Combine the flours and sugar in the bowl of a stand mixer, add the yeast to one side of the bowl and the salt, sugar, ground cinnamon and mixed spice to the other. Add the orange and lemon zest, all the preferment, the re-weighed chai spice water, and egg. Using the dough hook attachment, mix on a medium speed until a cohesive dough forms – a minute or two. Cover with a damp tea towel and leave to autolyse for 20 minutes. Once autolysed, mix again on a medium speed for around 8 minutes or until medium gluten development is achieved, leave for 5 minutes to rest. Once rested, start the mixer on medium speed again, and add the butter a little at a time, once all the butter has been added, knead for another 8 minutes or until the dough is smooth and elastic and passing the windowpane test. Finally add the sultanas and mixed peel, knead into the dough as best you can until just combined – you can do it in the mixer, but you may need to get your hands in as well to make sure it is all thoroughly incorporated. Transfer the dough to a lightly oiled bowl, cover with clingfilm and leave to prove in a warm environment for around 2 hours or until doubled in size.

Grease and line a 9x13” baking tray with parchment. Once doubled in size, remove the dough from the bowl, divide into 12 equal sized chunks – they should be around 85g-90g in weight. Shape each chunk into a neat ball and arrange in the prepared tin, leaving a gap in between each to allow for them to rise. Pop in a proving bag or cover with clingfilm and prove for a second time for around 90 minutes or until roughly doubled in size.

Meanwhile, prepare the cross, combine the sugar, flour, and water in a bowl, mix thoroughly to form a paste - go slowly with the water, it’s a little tricky to judge the *perfect* consistency; you are trying to achieve a thick put pipe-able paste. Transfer to a piping bag fitted with a small round nozzle and set aside until ready to use.

Next prepare the glaze, weigh your remaining spice water (I had 35g), and add enough strongly brewed chai tea to make a combined weight of 100g – so I added 65g chai tea to my 35g spice water - transfer to a small saucepan and add the sugar, place over a medium heat, and bring to the boil, once boiling, remove from the heat and set aside to cool. Preheat the oven to 200C/180Cfan.

Once risen, pipe neat crosses onto the buns and bake in the oven for around 20 minutes or until puffed up, golden, and baked through.

Remove from the oven and brush the tops of each bun with a little of the spiced sugar syrup. Remove from the baking tray and pop onto a wire rack, carefully peel away the parchment - take care with this bit as the buns are very soft still- and leave to cool fully.

Once cooled, enjoy fresh with butter or go rogue and opt for something a little savoury - bacon/cheese seem to be popular options. These buns keep pretty well due to the addition of the preferment, but regardless, they are arguably best toasted and buttered on day 2/3. Alternatively, freeze them as soon as they are cooled and defrost on demand for good as new hot cross buns!

NOTES

• You CAN forgo the preferment stage of this bake and just incorporate it into the main dough. Similarly, you could make the spice tea infusion just an hour before using if you want same day hot cross buns. The trade-off is that the dough may be a little tricker to work with and flavour will be slightly compromised but it’s totally feasible if that works better for your schedule!

• The glaze makes AMPLE - you could feasibly halve the quantity I list above, and still have surplus leftover - I have listed the amount above because it’s what I do, but don’t assume it all needs to be used to coat the buns. Just give them a light brushing, and reserve any leftover for drenching a spiced sponge cake or drizzle a little into your porridge - it tastes dreamy so absolutely mustn’t be wasted!!

• I mentioned my Bake Off recipe for Hot Cross Buns and linked it above, but I also have a recipe in my latest book, which you can find here - this version is a slightly leaner dough - more of a fruity/zesty milk bun - still lush but a little less luxurious.

OTHER BITS

• I really enjoyed watching fellow Bake Off-er, Chetna, on Jamie’s £1 Wonders - I love seeing other Bake Off alumni bossing it in their own sweet ways and this was a particularly big bossing it moment I thought. Apart from being really natural, relaxed and funny, her chicken curry recipe looked NEXT level - I’m absolutely going to have to give it a go!

• … still on the topic of Bake Off; I absolutely LOVED last weekend’s Stand Up To Cancer episode! I adore Tom Daley, Adele Roberts is a complete warrior/superhero of a woman, I loved the sound of David Morrissey’s salmon and watercress quiche, and comedian Lucy Beaumont had me in stitches the whole way through - a wonderfully uplifting viewing - worth a watch if you missed it!

• Formula 1 season is in full swing and given that I’m team Lewis, I thoroughly enjoyed his unexpected success in last weekend’s race… also, Melbourne is on my bucket list for places to visit - it looks SO magical there!

• … on the topic of sport, I cannot WAIT for the summer sports to kick off properly in the next few weeks - athletics, tennis, cricket, golf… you name it, I’m here for it.

• I’ve never really found meditation, in its purest sense, that useful - my mediation is immersing myself in a bake or going for a walk - but an advert for the Calm app popped up on my Insta the other day that was playing a ‘rolling thunderstorm soundscape’ - anyone heard it? I’ve gotta admit, it was such a soothing sound - it astounds me how certain sounds, smells, feelings can evoke such strong emotions in us. I loved it and would recommend you go and listen to a rolling thunderstorm soundscape if you need a moment of zen!

• I had my first Jersey Royal potatoes of the year this week, strictly speaking I’m not sure they are in season just yet, but gawd they were good, creamy, sweet, a lil’bit nutty… I roasted them in a little olive oil and served them with spring greens and herb crusted Haddock - NOM!

Right, that’s it for another week from me. I hope you are all having a thoroughly restful and enjoyable Easter break!

If things still feel tough, I’m right there with ya, and as ever, I’m sending the biggest hug! Smile when you can, cry when you need to, don’t feel alone with your thoughts - talk it out - surround yourself with your best people and do things that make you feel good… read, walk, run, paint, bake… just give yourself the love you deserve!

and from me, have a little more Love!

From Steph xxx