#45 I'm not ill

Ugh - ok, I’m about to moan (sorry). I don’t do being ill, which I’m not by the way… I’m adamant I’m NOT ill, but I suspect I may have something on me, because gawd I’ve been epically tired this week. I’ve also felt mildly woozy - you know that feeling you get if you go on a boat that bobs a lot? Like that - and slightly nauseous (my natural instinct when I feel sick is to eat something in the hope that it ‘takes it away’, can’t say it’s been a foolproof remedy). Naturally, I’ve suspected that death is imminent, ( I’m only partly joking when I say that) and it has taken every ounce of my willpower to avoid Dr Google. You know what’s annoying as well? If I had a cold, or was vomiting (neither of which I want, just to be clear) at least I would think, ‘oh HELL, I’m ill’, but this is just like a gremlin in the system, and I’m finding it thoroughly irritating.

The upshot of this bout of ‘not-illness-but-a-bit-off-ness’ is that I’ve epically struggled (for another week - V.poor from me) to motivate myself to DO STUFF and so I feel like an A-grade sloth!

In the spirit of keeping things around here as ‘upbeat’ as possible, I have compiled a list of the things that have made me laugh/kept me going whilst I’ve been mopey… so here goes:

• Lying on the sofa mid-afternoon on Monday for a ‘nap’. It was a pitiful attempt (I’m incapable of napping), but was a relaxing 20 minutes nonetheless, I must try it more often!

• Spending way too long on Rightmove searching for houses that I will never afford but that I can dream of living in.

• Eating some marvellous meals - on the menu has been:

  • Spanakopita-style chickpea salad (recipe below)

  • Marinated souvlaki chicken goujons, cucumber mint rice and raita,

  • Basil pesto pasta with roasted veg - basil is perfectly sweet right now, I highly recommend making some pesto and slapping it on pasta for the simplest, most comforting meal.

  • Pan fried haddock, ratatouille and roasted new potatoes

• Reading ‘Outliers’ - the bestselling book from Malcolm Galdwell. This book has been on my bookshelf since my uni days - I randomly fished it out at the beginning of the week and am thoroughly enjoying it. It’s an amazing insight into the lives of some of the World’s most ‘successful’ people. Ultimately it highlights the fact that many of the most ‘incredible’ individuals have, by their own admission, been afforded a huge amount of luck to get to where they are. Evidence suggests that, whilst an inherent level of aptitude and interest for a discipline is often present; success, wealth and even skill in a field, is often the result of opportunities, good fortune, and a stable, nurturing and prosperous environment. I frequently put myself down for ‘not fulfilling my potential in life’, and by comparing myself to others, feel like a failure, but this insight felt like a helpful reminder that the people I idolise will have walked a very different path to me, and thus their position in their field of expertise is completely incomparable to my own.

• I managed to get a keyring (the one attached to my purse) stuck on my thumb whilst at the Co-op - I couldn't help but laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation as I attempted to wrestle it off whilst trying to pretend nothing was amiss! (I managed to get it off by the way… it took longer than I would have liked though!)

• Once a week for a hair wash during the summer months is not acceptable - probably something you are all WELL aware of but worth noting!

• Eating food that is too hot results in tastebud annihilation - don’t do it - literally, your mouth is a right-off for at least a day!

• We’ve hit the peak… the 21st of June was the longest day… which can only mean one thing… it’s a slippery slope downhill from here! (Ok, I admit this isn’t my finest example of positivity - better to get myself well prepared for the inevitable though eh?)

• Laughing should come with a health warning… Ok, hear me out, on Thursday evening, in a moment of delirium, Mum and I got the giggles (perspective, this is very rare). For context, we were sat outside late having had dinner and attempting a general knowledge crossword that frankly is a bit beyond us. As we aimlessly guessed at the answers, desperately trying to modify words such that they fit into the boxes, we started to laugh at the ridiculousness of ourselves; not only were our lives reduced to taking a crossword VERY seriously, we also were cheating at it. Well, we got the giggles and I’m not joking, I thought I was going to explode - you know that feeling that you are going to burst with the pressure inside you? My stomach and face ached, I was hot, I had to lie down to allow the moment to subside - honestly, it was an ORDEAL. I mean, it was a very welcome moment of happiness that I will cherish, but honestly, I can’t get over the strength of emotions at times!!!

You know what, considering how I’ve been feeling, I’m quite proud of that positivity list this week. I’m afraid that’s rinsed me though so it’s time to deep dive into some recipe action. Below are recipes for: another wholesome flavourful salad, roasted peaches and traditional Italian Cantucci - which I’ve spent the week perfecting. Meanwhile, over on TCC+ you can find my recipe for cheese and chive sour cream buns. Enjoy!

Spanakopita chickpea salad

I LOVE herbs, and much like with fruit, I overbuy them - particularly in the summer. This week I found a stash of dill in the fridge that desperately needed using. The first thing that came to mind as I considered how I could incorporate it into my lunch, was Spanakopita - a Greek savoury spinach pie. I didn’t have the stamina to labour over a pie nor did I fancy any oven action, so I decided to use this dish as inspiration for a salad instead. Drawing on the flavours and ingredients often associated with Spanakopita, I came up with this chickpea, bulgur salad, it’s light, fresh, nourishing, and packed with flavour - with hindsight, it closely resembles a salad recipe I shared in one of my early newsletters, nevertheless is tastes great and if nothing else, it’s a reminder you that you should make it!

Serves 3

Ingredients

90g Wholewheat Bulgur
1 shallot peeled & finely chopped
1 Fat garlic clove grated
240g Chickpeas drained weight from a jar Bold Bean are my go-to but you know this right?
20g Dill finely chopped
10g Mint finely chopped
80g Baby spinach roughly chopped
½ cucumber (approx. 150g) roughly chopped
Maldon salt and pepper to taste
Zest of 1/2 lemon

75g Feta crumbled
15g Toasted pine nuts

Dressing

2 tbsp Extra Virgin olive oil plus extra for frying
1 tbsp lemon juice
1 tbsp sherry vinegar
1 tsp Dijon mustard

Method

Cook the bulgur according to the packet instructions and allow to cool.

Place a small frying pan over a medium heat, add a drizzle of olive oil followed by the shallot and cook for 5 mins or until translucent, add the grated garlic clove and cook for a further 30 seconds to a minute. Transfer to a large bowl and allow to cool. Once cool, add the chickpeas and toss to combine, then mix in the spinach, cucumber, lemon zest, and herbs.

Prepare the dressing by combining all the ingredients in a small bowl and stirring until homogenous (you can alternatively combine the ingredients in a clean jar, add the lid and shake to mix).

To assemble, combine the bulgur and chickpea mixture, add the dressing, and toss to combine, season with salt and pepper to taste. When ready to serve, top with the crumbled feta and toasted pine nuts.

Roasted peaches

When peaches are good - it’s hard not to just eat them as they come, however, if you can exercise a modicum of self-control, they are also incredibly good roasted and served with something creamy (sweet or savoury).

As you all know, I love to cook fruit; I find it draws out a more complex, comforting flavour and this recipe is a perfect example of that. I will happily eat these roasted peaches as part of a salad - with burrata, rocket, some herbs, and a touch of lemon, or atop a piece of sourdough toast, spread with creamy ricotta. As a dessert they’re perfect with some whipped yoghurt cream and Cantucci or amaretti and they feel like such a treat served with yoghurt and granola for breakfast.
Don’t let the simplicity of this recipe deceive you - they’re the epitome of simplicity, comfort, and elegance.

Ingredients

200g Peaches approx 2 peaches
10g Honey
10g Caster sugar
½ tsp almond extract
25ml orange juice

Method

Preheat the oven to 200C/180C fan. De-stone the peaches (you can also use nectarines), and cut into 8ths. Place in an oven proof dish, add the remaining ingredients and toss to coat. Roast in the oven, basting every 5 mins, until just tender, remove and allow to cool in the dish – it can take anywhere from 15-30 minutes depending on the ripeness of your fruit.

TIP

• For the perfect ‘peaches and cream’ dessert, serve the cooled roasted peaches with a dollop of ‘honey whipped yoghurt cream’ and crumbled Cantucci (see below).

  For the cream, combine 10g honey with 50g Greek yoghurt and briefly whisk until smooth, add 50g double cream and whip to medium/soft peaks.

Cantucci

In Italian, the word Cantuccio means ‘little place’, ‘nook’ or ‘corner. In the past, this phrase was also used to describe the nubbly, crusty, end of a loaf of bread (arguably the best bit and reason for buying a loaf of bread in the first place, I will actively seek out any bread product that has excitingly gnarly ends). This then, is the most perfect description of these biscuits; slightly angular, crooked and crust heavy - ‘a sweet nook in which a little solace can be sought.’

These biscuits originate from Prato in Tuscany - as I’m sure many of you are aware, they are traditionally oblong in shape, dry and crunchy, comfortingly sweet and in this case, redolent with almond. Traditionally, they are served at the end of a meal alongside a glass of sweet wine or sometimes with a coffee for breakfast.

This Cantucci recipe is super easy to prepare and a great canvas for all manner of variations, chuck in pistachios for colour, or add some orange or lemon zest for a wonderful zesty note (massage the zest into the sugar for optimum flavour before combining with the dry ingredients as per the method below). Hazelnuts are another great alternative to almonds – especially if you subsequently drizzle the baked biscotti in melted chocolate – or you can add a handful of dried fruit which creates a slightly chewy texture and a further layer of flavour.

If you are looking for a low effort, high reward bake that keeps especially well, give these ones a go - make them you’re own by adding your own tweaks and experience their simple, sweet pleasure.

Makes ~18 biscuits

Ingredients

75g Almonds roasted, very roughly chopped (you want big chunks and some can be kept whole)

125g Plain flour
½ tsp baking powder
95g Caster sugar
Pinch of flaky salt

1 Egg - 50g egg - weight out of shell

15g Unsalted butter melted and cooled a bit
1.5 tsp Amaretto
½ tsp Almond Extract

Method

Preheat the oven to 200C/180C Fan. Line a baking tray with parchment. Measure the almonds, flour, baking powder, sugar, and salt into the bowl of a stand mixer, mix to thoroughly combine. Add the egg, melted butter, amaretto, and almond extract, and mix on a low speed until just combined. Bring the dough together and on a lightly floured work surface, roll into a sausage approximately 30cm in length and 5cm wide. Transfer to the lined baking tray and bake in the oven for 20 minutes.

Once baked, remove from the oven, and leave for 10-15 minutes to cool a bit, meanwhile, reduce the oven temperature to 160C/140C fan. Once cooled, using a sharp knife cut the dough on the bias, into approx. 1.5cm slices(I find the best technique is to score the top of the dough with a serrated knife, then with a very sharp knife cut right through the dough with a firm precise motion). Arrange the slices cut side up back on the lined baking tray, and return to the oven. Bake for 10 minutes, then flip and bake for a further 10 mins –just keep an eye on the end pieces, I tend to remove these a little early to prevent them from catching. Once baked, remove from the oven and transfer to a wire rack to cool. Serve with coffee, a sweet wine or crumbled onto fruit and yoghurt as a dessert.

A final note…

One final thing I want to share this week, is a short passage a read over on Instagram that read as follows…

"One day you’ll have whatever it is you’re now so confusedly seeking. That kind of calm that comes from knowing oneself and others. But you can’t rush the arrival of that state of mind. There are things you only learn when no one teaches them. And that’s how it is with life. There’s even more beauty in discovering it for yourself, in spite of the suffering. Sensitive people are both unhappier and happier than others. But give it some time."

… I’m afraid I don’t know of the original source, but these words really resonated with me… and I thought they may for some of you too. Patience is key, as is being kind to yourself in the process.

Love and hugs as always,

Steph X X X